近日，知名舞蹈家杨丽萍因网友的一条评论上了“热搜”，同时这条评论也在网上引起热议。
事情源于本月4日，杨丽萍的团队账号在某短视频平台晒出一段杨丽萍吃火锅的视频，视频中的她身穿白色长裙，举止优雅。
但本该是一段让人心情愉悦的视频，留言区却出现这样一条评论：
"一个女人最大的失败是没一个儿女，所谓活出了自己都是蒙人的，让你再年轻30年，到了100岁，你的容颜难道还能保护30岁样子，即使你再美再优秀都是逃不过岁月的摧残，到了90岁，儿孙满堂那种天伦之乐。"
更为意外的是，短短时间内，这条评论的点赞数竟然破万，可见不少网友是认同此观点的。
但这个说法更多引来的是反驳：绝大部分网友认为每位女性都有权利选择是否生孩子，而不是必须生孩子，女性不应该被当作生育的工具；也有一些网友认为：每个人都有自己的活法，别人无权对他人的生活指手画脚。
除了网友，戚薇、李若彤、陈数等众多明星也纷纷出来发声：
随后，杨丽萍在评论区回复争议内容，发表了自己的看法：
“人会走向衰老，走向死亡，谁也救不了你，但你的精神是年轻的，你的气息是美好的，就会散发出来一种特殊的味道。只要自己过得好，没有伤害其他人，就可以。谢谢大家的理解和爱，望我们都能自在，如我。”
该话题热度之所以持续发酵，因为已经超越事件本身，上升到了“女性生育自由”的讨论。
从确认生育权作为基本人权到今天，整个社会可以说形成了一定程度上的共识，即生育是自由的。但我们仍要问，作为女性，真的有不生育的自由了吗？当一位女性决定不生育，她会遭遇什么？小编之前看过一个TED演讲，演讲者克里斯滕·雷莱特从小就知道自己不想要孩子，但在寻求绝育的过程中，她遇到了太多阻碍。在这篇有力的演讲中，克里斯滕·雷莱特表达了自己很重要的一个观念，那就是：母亲身份是女性身份的延伸，而不是定义。
演讲文本：
I recognized the roles that were placed on me very early. One persistent concept that I observed -- existing in our language, in our media -- was that women are not only supposed to have children, they are supposed to want to. This existed everywhere. It existed in the ways that adults spoke to me when they posed questions in the context of "when." "When you get married ..." "When you have kids ..."
我在小时候就认识到了自己在社会上的角色。据我观察，有一个根深蒂固的观念，存在于我们的语言和媒体中。那就是女人不仅应当有孩子，而且她们自己也想要有孩子。这种观念无处不在。当大人们在“当你······”的语境中提问，它就存在于他们跟我说话的方式里。“当你结婚的时候······”“当你有了孩子······”
And these future musings were always presented to me like part of this American dream, but it always felt to me like someone else"s dream. You see, a value that I have always understood about myself was that I never wanted children. And as a kid, when I would try to explain this, this disconnect between their roles and my values, they often laughed in the way that adults do at the absurdities of children. And they would tell me knowingly, "You"ll change your mind."
对未来的这些思考总是呈现在我面前，就像美国梦一样，但对我来说，这就像是别人的梦想。我一直了解自己的价值观，那就是我从来没想过要孩子。但我很小的时候，我试图去向大人们解释他们的角色和我价值观的脱节时，他们经常笑我，以一种大人对待小孩的无稽之谈的方式。并且他们仿佛什么都知道一样告诉我，“你会回心转意的。”
And people have been saying things like that to me my whole life. Otherwise polite conversation can turn intrusive fast. "Does your husband know?"
一辈子都有人这样对我说。但是，礼貌的谈话会很快变成侵入性的谈话。”你丈夫知道吗？”
"Do your parents know?" "Don"t you want a family?" "Don"t you want to leave anything behind?" And the primary buzzword when discussing childlessness, "That"s selfish."
“你的父母知道吗？”“你不想要一个家庭吗？”“你不想在身后留下点什么吗？”在讨论无子女问题的时候，最流行的词就是，“这太自私了。”
There are countless reasons a woman may have for choosing to abstain from motherhood, the majority of them not self-prioritizing. But it is still socially acceptable to publicly vilify women as such, because none of these reasons have made it into the social narrative. When I was little and learning about the inevitability of maternity, it was never explained to me the commonness of these factors that women consider like the risk of passing on hereditary illness, the danger of having to stop life-saving medication for the duration of your pregnancy, concern about overpopulation, your access to resources, and the fact that there are 415,000 children in the foster-care system in the United States at any given time. Reasons like these, many more, and the fact that I don"t like to leave things of this magnitude to chance, all informed my decision to become surgically sterilized.
一个女人有无数的原因选择不做母亲。她们中大多数都没有优先考虑自己。但社会还是选择接受这种公开诋毁妇女的想法，因为没有任何理由使绝育变为社会上一种流行的说法。我小时候就知道了做母亲的必然性，但从没人跟我解释妇女需要考虑的因素，像遗传疾病的风险，怀孕期间不得不停止使用救命药的危险，人口过剩的担忧，获取资源的机会，以及在美国有415000个孩子被寄养的事实。像这样的原因还有很多，为了杜绝这些问题发生，我决定做绝育手术。
I began my research eagerly. I wanted to fully understand all that was going to come with undergoing a tubal ligation, which is just another word for getting your tubes tied. I wanted to know approval to aftermath, satisfaction rates, risks, statistics. And at first, I was empowered.
我开始热切的做相关的调查。我想要完全了解关于输卵管结扎手术的一切，简单来说，就是把你的输卵管打个结。我想知道对善后工作的认可程度，满意度，风险，统计数据。开始的时候，我大受鼓舞。
You see, the way the narrative has always been taught to me, I would have thought that women who didn"t want children were so rare, and then I learned one in five American women won"t be having a biological child -- some by choice, some by chance.
要知道，过去的观念还一直影响着我，我本以为不想要孩子的女性非常的少，但是后来我了解到，在美国，有五分之一的女人不想生育孩子。有些是自愿的，有些是偶然的。
But I was not alone. But the more I read, the more disheartened I became. I read women"s stories, trying desperately to get this procedure. I learned how common it was for women to exhaust their finances appealing to dozens of ob-gyns over many years, only to be turned down so many times, often with such blatant disrespect that they just gave up. Women reported that medical practitioners were often condescending and dismissive of their motivations, being told things like, "Come back when you"re married with a child."
所以我不是一个人在战斗。但是我了解得越多，就变得越沮丧。我了解了很多女人的经历，她们不顾一切地想要做绝育手术。但很多女人为此倾家荡产，很多年来，咨询了几十个妇产科医生，得到的结果只有被拒绝，还经常受到不公的待遇，最后她们都放弃了。很多妇女报告说，执业医生经常是高傲的，对她们的决定不屑一顾。她们得到的回答往往是，“等你结婚有小孩后再来吧。”
But women who did have children, who went to go get this procedure, were told they were too young, or they didn"t have enough children, which is very interesting, because the legal requirements in my state for getting this kind of surgery were, "Be at least 21 years old," "appear of sound mind, acting of your own accord," and "have a 30-day waiting period." And I was perplexed that I could meet all of these legal requirements and still have to face a battle in the exam room for my bodily autonomy. And it was daunting, but I was determined.
但当女人生完孩子，再去做绝育手术的时候，医生又会说她们太年轻了，或者她们还想要更多的孩子，这简直太嘲讽了。因为在我所在的州，做这种手术的法律规定是“21岁以上，”“心智健全，精神正常，”还要“30天的等待周期。”让我不解的是，我满足所有的法律要求，但为了我身体的自主权，在检验室仍然还要面临一场战争，这非常令人气馁，但我决心已定。
I remember I dressed so professionally to that first appointment.
我记得第一次赴约的时候，打扮得非常职业。
I sat up straight. I spoke clearly. I wanted to give that doctor every piece of evidence that I was not the date of birth in that file. And I made sure to mention things like, "I just got my bachelor"s degree and I"m applying to these doctoral programs, I"m going to study these things." And "my long-term partner has this kind of business," and "I"ve done research on this for months.
我坐得笔直。讲话也很清晰。我想让医生知道，我不是档案里那么年轻。我要确定传达出这些信息，“我刚刚取得学士学位，正在申请一些什么博士学位项目，我将来要做些什么研究。”并且“我的长期伴侣也是做这行的，”“关于绝育，我也已经做了几个月的研究了。
I understand everything about it, all the risks." Because I needed the doctor to know that this was not a whim, not reactionary, not your 20-something looking to go out and party without fear of getting knocked up ... (Laughter) that this supported something integral to who I was.
我了解各个方面和所有的风险。”因为我要让医生知道，这不是心血来潮，也不是要反对什么，更不是20来岁出去聚会担心肚子会被搞大——这么做只是为了让我成为我自己。
And I understand informed consent, so I fully expected to be reeducated on how it all worked, but ... At one point, the information being given to me started to feel agenda"d, interlaced with bias and inflated statistics. The questions began to feel interrogative. At first they were asking me questions that seemed to understand my situation better, and then it seemed like they were asking questions to try to trip me up. I felt like I was on the witness stand, being cross-examined.
我了解、知情并同意，我也做好了被教育的准备，但是...某种程度上，给我的信息就像事先安排好一样，交织着偏见和夸张的统计数据。我开始感觉像在被质问。起初他们问的问题，像是为了能够更好地理解我的情况，但后来的问题却像是有意引导我答错。我感觉自己像在证人席上被盘问。
The doctor asked me about my partner. "How does he or she feel about all of this?" "Well, I"ve been with the same man for five years, and he fully supports any decision I make for my body." And he said, "Well, what happens in the future, if you change partners? What happens when that person wants children?" And I didn"t quite know how to react to that, because what I was hearing was this doctor tell me that I"m supposed to disregard everything I believe if a partner demands children. So I told him not to worry about that. My stance on childbearing has always been first date conversation.
医生问了关于我伴侣的情况。“他（她）的态度是怎么样的？”“我跟他在一起五年了，他完全支持我对自己身体的任何决定。”他说：“好吧，如果将来你换伴侣了怎么办？万一那个伴侣想要孩子呢？"我真的不知道怎么回应了，因为我所听到的是，这个医生认为，如果伴侣想要孩子的话，我就应该抛弃我的信仰，所以我告诉他不要担心这些，关于生小孩的态度，我一定会在第一次约会的时候声明的。
He then asks me to consider how "in 20 years, you could really come to regret this" ... as though I hadn"t. I told him, "OK, if I wake up one day and realize, you know, I wish I"d made a different decision back then, the truth is, I"d only removed a single path to parenthood. I never needed biology to form family anyway."
然后他又问我，如果20年后你真的后悔了怎么办? 好像我一定会后悔似的。我告诉他，“如果我有天醒来，意识到我希望当时做了一个不同的决定，但其实我只是少了一条通往做父母的路，无论如何，我从不需要通过生物血缘关系来组建家庭。”
And I would much